Caring for Kids and Aging Parents Without Losing Yourself

Being a mom is already a full-time job — but add in caregiving for aging parents, and you’re part of the “Sandwich Generation,” juggling the needs of two generations while trying to preserve your own sanity. It’s a heavy, emotional load. But you’re not alone, and there are ways to not just survive it, but to find strength and support within it.

What Is the Sandwich Generation?

The Sandwich Generation refers to adults — mostly women — who are caring for both their own children and their aging parents at the same time. It’s a role filled with love, but also fatigue, guilt, and often, financial strain.

Survival Guide for Moms in the Middle

1. Prioritize Ruthlessly

You cannot be everything to everyone every day. Make a weekly “must-do” list for your kids, your parents, and yourself. Anything that doesn’t make the list gets postponed or delegated.

2. Set Boundaries (And Stick to Them)

Say no without guilt. Set visiting hours, limit calls during work, and block off family-only time. Boundaries are a form of love — for others and for yourself.

3. Build Your Circle

Lean on your village. Whether it’s a sibling, partner, friend, or paid caregiver, allow others to step in. Join online or local support groups for sandwich generation caregivers where you can vent and get advice.

4. Streamline What You Can

Use tech and services to your advantage. Grocery delivery, calendar apps, medication reminders, and automatic bill pay can shave hours off your week.

5. Involve the Kids

Let older kids help in age-appropriate ways: folding laundry for grandma, helping with meals, or reading together. It’s a way to nurture empathy and share responsibilities.

6. Take Your Health Seriously

Sleep, hydration, and mental health aren’t luxuries; they’re survival tools. Even 10 minutes of daily alone time (deep breaths in the bathroom count!) can help regulate stress.

7. Ask for Help Early

Don’t wait for burnout. Call in respite care, talk to a counselor, or speak with a care manager to navigate resources for your parents. You’re not failing — you’re preserving yourself for the long haul.

Final Thought

You’re the glue holding generations together, but even glue needs rest or it loses its stick. Take care of yourself with the same compassion you give to others. Your strength is real, and you’re doing an extraordinary job, even on the days it doesn’t feel like it.

We offer senior care services that are customized for your family. If you’re interested in learning how we can support your aging journey, visit www.agingadvocatescny.com or call 315-469-1000.

This is sponsored content by Aging Advocates CNY.